| > | | | | we had around the house was fantastic. The |
| There seems to be at times, a fine line between | | | | brass fireplace was indeed metal, so was a 2p |
| enthusiasm and frenzied delight, and with Miranda | | | | casually dropped on the carpet, then hunted |
| Krestovnikoff, who presents BBC 2’s | | | | down, with much squealing from both man and |
| Hidden Treasure, that line is all too frequently | | | | machine. |
| blurred. | | | | And then there was the garden of course. I |
| Still, perhaps I’m being a little too hard on | | | | expertly discovered the ley lines that relate to the |
| the poor girl. After all, it’s her enthusiasm | | | | drainage system. This should have been done |
| that caused me to go out the other day and buy | | | | privately. |
| a metal detector. I’d like to think that | | | | However, we live in a quiet, semi-retired, |
| I’m the only one to have done this, at | | | | semi-detached area, and my tracking the drainage |
| least in my town, but regrettably, I suspect | | | | caused the district net curtains to act as if there |
| I’m in the majority
| | | | was a tornado approaching. |
| After all, I went into one of the local shops on the | | | | We rent the house we currently live in and our |
| day of purchase, asking if they did indeed sell | | | | landlord is slow when it comes to getting things |
| metal detectors, and this young man serving | | | | done, so, in a way, the metal detector really |
| behind the counter immediately asked if I’d | | | | came into its own when I decided to phone our |
| been watching BBC 2 recently. I didn’t | | | | landlord. There’s a ladder on our roof that |
| know how to take this. Now obviously, | | | | has been there all year and it’s been |
| he’d sussed me but
well, was that | | | | annoying me, so I thought I’d have him on |
| good manners on his part, or just cheeky | | | | toast. The phone call went like this. |
| perception? | | | | Hello, Bob, it’s Holmes here. I bought a |
| I mean, had I gone into my local branch of M & S | | | | metal detector today and discovered |
| and been caught perusing the boxer shorts, I | | | | there’s a ladder on the roof. This could |
| think I’d have taken umbrage, had a shop | | | | attract burglars, surely. |
| assistant inquired if I’d recently had a case | | | | There was such a pause at the other end of the |
| of the runs. I digress. Suffice to say, I felt | | | | line. I could hear confused steam coming from his |
| uncomfortable, embarrassed, found out, with my | | | | ears as he got this mental image of my scaling |
| BBC 2 viewing detected so instantly. | | | | the house with a metal detector. |
| Anyway, my fiancée and I finally located one | | | | The ladder is still there. All that’s changed is |
| of these machines in one of the nearby catalogue | | | | the landlord now seems incredibly wary of me |
| stores
which meant that once we had got it | | | | when he collects the rent each month
|
| home, we needed to drive off out to one of the | | | | Now, where did I put the washing machine? |
| nearby catalogue stores to buy some batteries, | | | | © Copyright Holmes Charnley mmiv. All rights |
| amidst much muttering. | | | | reserved. |
| Still, once this thing was up and running, the fun | | | | |